Notes for Staying Sane in a Difficult World

I went for a walk yesterday. A late afternoon walk, the sun was lowering towards the hills, the snow we had earlier this week already washed away by the rain that came last night. The trail was mushy and muddy in spots. I passed a few people, enough humans to keep me from feeling like bear bait. (Are they still sleeping?)

Just before leaving for my walk, I’d been at my desk, willing myself not to spend one more second scrolling through news or social media. Instead, I went to my Notes. I use the app on my phone to store thoughts, reminders, and lists. I found a list I’d made a few years ago, notes I wrote to myself during a previous difficult moment in both the world and my life.

I was still thinking about those notes when I saw the eagles. Bald Eagles. Canadian Bald Eagles. I call them “The Balds,” like they’re my neighbours. They start congregating around here this time of year. They meet like a family occupying different branches on the same tree, or several families in several trees, some flying from one tree to another.

Today, I offer you my notes for staying sane along with my eagle pictures. I’m long past my former photographer days when I lugged around a big camera with a long heavy lens. I enjoy the slim device that slides in and out of my pocket. These are all from my phone.

Notes For Staying Sane in a Difficult World:

-Find a purpose. Tend to your inner world while staying connected to the one outside your walls.

-Be part of a community. Be seen and heard. Stay inspired to contribute.

-Spend your energy where it can be effective. Small local efforts can do wonders.

-Stay informed about what’s going on in the world, but know that you can’t fix it with anger and indignation. This is hard for thinking people. Feel the global pain, yes; do what you are able to do to fight back, yes; but don’t let it paralyze you.

-Be in this very moment - not the past, not the future - live in the now.

-Educate yourself carefully in these days of rampant misinformation.

-Do what you can to take care of the planet.

-Treat people well. Even the ones who irritate the hell out of you. Don’t be an a$$hole just because you’re talking to one.

-Listen more than you speak.

-Hear not only your like-minded friends, but also the voices of those who think differently than you do.

-Pay attention to your relationships with those you love. Keep them healthy.

-Don’t apologize when you have nothing to apologize for.

-Learn to apologize when you should. A genuine apology. Not one that masquerades as an apology or sloughs off accountability. You can recognize those. They start off like this: “I’m sorry, but . . . “ or “It wasn’t my intention . . . “ An honest apology has no but. It sounds like this: “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry my words/actions caused you pain.”

-Understand your inherited beliefs, values, and biases. Shake the dust off them. Take them apart. Evaluate them. Decide which ones to keep. Discard the rest.

-Use your voice for good. If the words you are about to say (or email or text) don’t serve a good purpose, don’t put them out in the world.

-Nourish yourself with real food, small pleasures, and self-love.

-Say f*ck whenever you need to. It’s just a word, an extremely useful one when it’s not over-used. Sometimes it’s the only word for the moment.

-Find a way back from a f*ck moment to a better one. Don’t give in to fear.

-Forgive yourself when you mess up. Then start over again at the top of this list.

Thanks for tuning in. If this teeny tiny photo essay speaks to you, please feel free to share it with a friend or three using the link below. All four of my published books are available through my website: myrlcoulter@me.com